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" Using it is on both of us," said Carol. "I was as intrigued by the ideaof trying sex from the other side of the gender divide as you were."If you're Californian, earthquakes are a fact of life you just have tolearn to live with. Even so, the one that struck us four and a halfmonths ago was unexpectedly strong, and its epicentre was only a coupleof miles from our little town. We were in bed asleep when it hit, but Iwas awake and racing down the hallway to our daughter's bedroom withinseconds.I wasn't fast enough.The roof collapsed as I reached the door to Eloise's room, falling allaround me and swatting me to the floor and, I later learned, knockingCarol unconscious. Amazingly, I was unharmed and so was Eloise, thoughshe was pinned to the floor by a fallen beam and obviously frightened bywhat had happened."Daddy!" she cried, when she saw me."It's OK, sweetie, I'll get you out," I said, reaching under the beam tolift it.That was when my fingers touched Eloise's flesh and something. He looked at me — the grimly satisfied expression on his face will be with me forever — and said quietly, yet totally unperturbed, »Nee dankie, meneer, alles is doodreg!« — »No, Sir, thank you, everything is dead right!«Chicken BossIn the late 1980s, when the writing was on the wall that Afrikaner domination would soon come to an end, an old bachelor farmer living in the northernmost parts of the country, the hot and dusty, draught and crime-ridden Northern Transvaal Province, decided to pack up and move to the Cape Province with its moderate climate, much lower crime rate and a more equal mixture of races and nationalities.He proceeded to load all of his meagre belongings onto his small truck, making up quite a load nevertheless, and stuck his pet parrot, his only speaking companion for well over 20 years, on top of everything, its cage secured with string. And off he went, after lighting his pipe with his chokingly smelly Boeretwak (tobacco). The road from the northern parts of the.
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